DEMORALIZATION WITH A LIRRU BIT OF WRITER’S BLOCK

Helloooo everyone. I’m back
I hope y’all missed me because I missed myself (Lol). Today is my 3years blog-anniversary (Screeaaaammm) and I’m sooo happy. I am also appreciative of how far I’ve come. It’s been God, really.

Is this the point where I’d apologize for being AWOL? I remember saying I didn’t like seeing bloggers use this line as it doesn’t make us work on being consistent. Well, here I am (🤦🏽‍♀️). Please forgive me.

Phewww, where do I start from? My last post was on the 1st of October; Nigeria’s Independence Day. Two days prior to that, Nigerians were already expressing their anger towards the 60years of a failed system. I was angry too. I woke up on October 1st and I saw angry Nigerians struggle to revive the little hope lying fallow. I jumped on the bandwagon of revival and decided to use my platform to spread the revival of hope. “Let’s give hope one last chance”.

A week later there was unrest everywhere; especially in our social media space (Majorly Twitter). This kind of unrest that should crush your hope and make you utter another one of your “Oh no! Not again” phrases. But this unrest didn’t lead to the usual devastation; it lead people into the streets. They remembered they were supposed to have a right to protest. That singular action woke sleeping youths around the country. The youths didn’t want to follow the path of the older generation that kept quiet while injustice was going on. It was in the middle of this that the slang “Sọrọ soke”, which means “speak louder/speak up” went mainstream. Everyone was charged up. Different protests were organized in different states of the country. Christians also organized interdenominational prayer walks. Oh là là! Our Independence Day hope wasn’t wasted afterall.

Organization were flying up, down, left and right. Medical, security, financial, legal and feeding aspects were being taken care of. A response team was set up by the youths. Nigerian youths didn’t have to be begged to volunteer. I was happy; extremely happy. This seemed to be the revolution we’ve been waiting for.

You might have wanted to ask, “Where was Chisom in all these?” Well, I was “sọrọ soke-ing” in my own way; just not on my blog. Let’s just say I was too knee deep in all that was going on to even set out time to write.

I wish this was were it ended; happily. Did you imagine it? The government actually listening to us and changing things for the better? Well, I’m a thinker, so I did. Our hopes were crushed, again.

The protest against police brutality was answered by more police brutality. A protest that was peaceful from start to finish. Can you imagine? Well, I’m sure you know all these. The news went mainstream. Despite the abuse of power and lack of regard for human rights, that wasn’t enough for them. One thing led to the other and some states decided to declare curfew. The curfew in Lagos State was unlawful, given that it was supposed to be announced 24hours before. I mean, how do you announce a curfew slated to start by 4pm in the morning when people have already resumed work? In a state that is infected with terrible traffic? Well, the governor shifted the commencement of the curfew to 8pm, but it doesn’t still make the cut. Peaceful protesters refused to go home. A few minutes to 7pm, soldiers from the Nigerian army came to the protest location (Lekki Toll gate) and started shooting at peaceful protesters. They denied this the next morning even though there were verified footages that captured men in the ARMY UNIFORM. Apart from that, about two people went live on Instagram. Can you edit an Instagram live video? One dumb politician said the videos were photoshopped; you’d be left to wonder if one of criteria to get into the Nigerian political space is senselessness. Many of them would prove you right.

The next week following the incident at the Lekki Toll gate on 20th October, 2020 was just filled with dark humour—the NIGERIAN GOVERNMENT treating matters of life and death as a joke. Telling cheap lies to cover the wickedness, just like they always done throughout our 60 years of independent history. From the Lagos State Governor saying there were no casualties, to him later saying his team visited the hospital. From the Nigerian Army denying being at Lekki Toll gate to them later saying that the Lagos State Governor requested for their presence (This was after the Lagos State Governor denied having anything to do with the Army’s presence at the Toll gate). Crazy right?

It left me with one question: Do these people think we’re jokes? They kept on telling more lies and acting funny dramas, and the more they did that, the angrier I became.

27 days of October got me from hopes to high hopes, optimism, then to hurt, anger and demoralization. That was it, hopes crushed. For sanity reasons, I would not say anything about the president nor his speech. We all started making jokes about leaving the country, but we knew how we felt inside; hurt.

I wanted to get past the demoralization and write something, but writer’s block came for a visit. My head was blank. I kept thinking about the situation of the country; especially when I remembered my independence day post, urging people to have hope.

Well, I decided to pick up my keyboard and write; you know, get past everything. My joy comes from God and no situation, no matter how demoralizing can keep me down. I want us to feel the say way.

I don’t know if I can still say I have hope. Maybe the hope has been reburied, waiting for another time to be dug up again.

I know this all sad, but there’s something to be happy about; my blog-anniversary. Please wish me a happy 3years of blogging 💃🎊